Conflict Management #3

Try it out!

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  • Last updated November 29, 2023 at 5:57 AM
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Use the collaborative process to work out a solution to a conflict. Reflect on the process and the outcome.

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Try It Out

The other day in class I had a longer lesson that I wanted to get through before the holiday break. I felt like if I broke it up into two lessons that were so far apart from each other, some students may have felt confused or not remembered the material we learned before break. During the middle of the lesson, it was clear to me that I was losing some of my student's focus. Some of them also made it clear to me that they were having a hard time focusing. I knew that students were not going to learn to the best of their ability if I kept going. We used the collaborative process to come up with a solution. I gave the students a brain break where they could reset, and then we finished the lesson. This worked out great for everybody involved due to the fact that we prioritized all of our feelings and came to an agreement. Even though this was just a minor conflict, I feel like collaboration worked well. 
anna-pearlman 20 days ago

Where are we spending Christmas?

My husband and I, year after year, have to decide where to spend Christmas. I  want to visit my family because I don’t see them often because they live 5 hours away. My husband wants to stay in town to celebrate with his side of the family. We see them weekly if not more. Plus we always celebrate Thanksgiving with them as well.  In addition to that, our son has varsity hockey practice the day after Christmas at 8 am in the morning and we have 2 other children to think of as well. This is always frustrating for me because I feel like my side of the family gets jipped. Instead of arguing, we decided to collaborate. We sat down together, shared why each option was important to us, and looked for a plan that worked for both families. We come up with a solution:  Because, our son has practice the day after it doesn’t make sense to drive to see my family on Christmas day so we decided to spend Christmas Eve and Christmas evening with my husband’s  family in town and then drive to visit my family on the day after Christmas and spend a few days at my parents house. By working together and combining both of our ideas, we solved the conflict in a fair and respectful way.  That’s not to say that it wasn’t hard to come up with a plan that works for everyone.  
emily-ryan 21 days ago

Reflection: Collaboration during group work

I used the collaborative process with a group of my ninth grade students.  In the collaborative process, the goal is to work until we all get what we want. In a classroom the scarcest resource is time. I had a group of ninth grade students that were in disagreement about what theme/style they should select for their Google Slideshow project.  The assignment and rubric clearly state the theme of the slides has to be unified and add to the presentation (not detract).  One group of 4 was in disagreement and split into two "camps" about theme. I knew which theme was the best choice, but instead of telling them, I wanted them to figure it out. I gave them 10 minutes to work it out. They had to examine the pros and cons of each theme in accordance with the assignment task and rubric.  After this, I told them to look at the themes again decide which was the best for the task (additional time granted here). This didn't really sit well with the two that wanted the bolder colors, so I suggested they look at all the possible themes one more time and see if they can find one that all four felt comfortable with. After a few more minutes, they all agreed and were happy with a theme that fit the assignment requirements.  It wasn't compromise because they ended up with a new choice of theme that had been previously overlooked.  It was the collaborative process because they had to talk it out and work on it until they found the option they were all happy with. 

This Badgelist about the collaborative process reminded me to use the collaborative process. Because of time scarcity, it is so easy to just solve the problems for the students or tell them to "quickly compromise."  So I have decided to make a mental note to use the collaborative process more in the future.  






valerie-indolfi About 1 month ago

Collaborative Process

I have found the collaborative process to be increasingly important in education. In working with students in editing their work, particularly their writing, I find that being collaborative in how I provide feedback is more effective than telling them how it should be written. I think this approach allows us both to listen to each other's reasoning for our edits. We read through, discuss possible phrasing, and question each other to come to the best solution. I find this to be most effective because accommodating and compromising have varying degrees of assertiveness and cooperation. Collaborating with my students on their writing provides optimal levels of cooperation and assertiveness, leaving us both satisfied with the results.
fdambro 7 months ago

Try it out!

In Athletic Study Hall after school, one of the clubs decided to sell snacks as a fundraiser for the club. The students in Athletic Study Hall were very excited because they get to buy snacks after school, especially since they are quite hungry! This is an awesome fundraiser for the club and a huge benefit to the students, but the disadvantage is that when they leave, there are wrappers and food on the floor and tables, despite being told by us adults every day to clean up after themselves. Sometimes they leave before we could have them pick up their trash. 
I decided today to speak to the groups and collaborate with them and we found a solution that can be implemented and if followed, will fully satisfy both groups! The solution was that the athletes can purchase and enjoy delicious snacks during athletic study hall and they will pick up their trash and throw them into the garbage cans without us having to remind them several times. The students agreed to this solution, and we adults were amazed today at how clean the tables and floor were. They reminded one another about picking up and throwing their trash. Part of the solution was that if the students didn't follow through, they will not be allowed to purchase treats anymore. 
I'm very excited about this win-win solution, and I am looking forward to great results!
r093803301r 7 months ago

try it out

During the LAS book studies I shared many examples of working with students to help them identify their wants and needs, using that perspective to develop classroom (and school level) supports to help ensure that the classroom remains a safe and productive space to learn (my need) and that the student is able to express their feelings and communicate their wants and needs in that space (eg that work is hard or they need a break etc). Using collaborative strategies has been so beneficial to getting buy-in from the students to try out strategies in the classroom. I've also worked with other teachers throughout the district to do the same and we have seem positive impact from collaborating with students at all academic levels.
tammy-thomas 7 months ago

Try it out!

Recently, a parent reached out about concerns she had about her child's academic progress and organizational skills.  The initial email asked the teachers to provide weekly emails/updates on their child's progress, what the homework is each night, and when tests/quizzes would be scheduled.  After the teachers/counselor discussion, we decided that the student needed to take on some of the responsibility.  We collaborated with the parent about our goals and hopes for the student.  The final result was that the student needs to use their agenda daily and check in with the teacher each class to have the agenda signed.  The parent was added to GC and was highly encouraged to use Parent Square to receive test updates.  Both the parent and teachers had their needs met.  We implemented the plan just after spring break, so we are hoping to see results by the end of the school year. 
jsherman 8 months ago

Collaboration without Compromise

As a committee, we had a conflict with a family who wished to keep their child classified as a student with speech-language impairment; however, they wanted to discontinue speech services due to the student not wanting to participate. Speech could not be discontinued if the student remained with this classification.   The committee felt that there was a better diagnosis that described the student and would allow for the discontinuation of speech services.  The parents were opposed to this reclassification.  We invited them to share their concerns regarding this issue collaboratively. They stated they felt that there may be a stigma associated with other diagnoses. We discussed this issue together and came up with a diagnosis that the parents were comfortable with and that best met the student's needs.
anna77 8 months ago

Students and math

I have students who shut down every day at math. When the going gets tough, they don't want to do the work or even hear me out as I work with them to complete a task or worksheet. The collaboration model is good because it shows students that they will be heard. I will listen to their needs and take them into consideration but they must listen to my needs as a teacher as well, and work to accomplish the task I am asking them to accomplish. Perhaps when sitting with students, I can have them brainstorm ways to get through the lesson, and can also give up a little control by offering them some solutions like not doing each problem. Or choosing 3 for example. 
adri22 8 months ago

Conflict

I have a student who finds math hard, he does not like math and with each lesson he says it gets harder and harder. He gets frustrated easily. I work one on one with him in the afternoon on math. He has to do his math work, so what I did was talk to the teacher about his difficulty in math. She said she could try to give him a certain amount of problems to complete, and that way he can visually see how many left. I tried this out with the student, and he enjoyed crossing out the number each time we did a problem and writing how many left. The teacher asks me after how that is working and I said it was working well.  
courtney2 9 months ago

Collaboration for Vacation :)

I am in the process of trying out this collaborative process for making teaching material for the new Next Gen Standards for Algebra 2, but I have already used collaboration to settle a conflict related to a personal matter. 
My family and four other families were picking a place to go on vacation. There were so many options- and we each had our own needs. For example, one family wanted to be within walking distance of the ocean, another family wanted enough beds for all, including kids. A third family wanted to go someplace that was within an 8-hour drive. We listened to each family's needs and brainstormed. We finally found a great destination where no one had to compromise- we each got what we wanted/needed. With collaboration, we all win!
eileenjroth04 10 months ago

Cell Phone Compromise

   Technology can be great, but I don’t like how often my kids are on their phones.  When they get in trouble, therefore, my first reaction is to punish them by taking away their phones for a day or longer.  I’ve had many battles about how “the punishment doesn’t fit the crime” and “why do you always go to the phone first?”  After a recent incident with my son, and with Dr. Rocky’s video fresh in my brain, I decided to try a new approach. Instead of the knee-jerk reaction of taking away his phone, we sat down together and had a long discussion. He explained to me that when I take away his phone, his friends think he is ghosting them.  He also explained to me that if I allow him to text his friends that he is losing his phone and won’t be able to text them for a while, they proceed to badger him as to what he did to lose his phone.  He said he doesn’t want to lie to them but it’s embarrassing to broadcast to everyone what he did wrong.  He also said it makes him very anxious because his coach only messages the group and not the parents about practice changes and the schedule.  I explained that I could monitor the phone for messages from the coach but I understood why it would be embarrassing for him to have to field questions from his friends whenever he messed up.  I want him to learn from his mistakes but I don’t think it’s necessary for his friends to know every time he gets in trouble for something.  

   After a lengthy discussion, we arrived at a compromise.  He can take his phone to school and after school, he will give me his phone.  He is allowed to check it but he must ask first and hand it back to me within a few minutes.  Believe it or not, my taking the phone away is no longer used as a punishment.  This phone procedure has become our new norm! My son is enjoying not having the pressure to check his phone all the time and I am thankful he is busying himself with other things.  I wish this compromise happened a long time ago! 
katie-jadhon 11 months ago