When a student experiences true positive regard and truly believes their teacher’s care and respect is not dependent on perfect behavior, it can shift how they see themselves and school. I’ve had students who initially resisted feedback or acted out. I'm thinking of one student in particular who expressed a pessimistic, end of the world, "I'm not going to become anything great anyway" attitude, but when I stayed calm, consistent, and continued treating them with kindness, their attitude began to change. We eventually reached a mutual understanding and trust that allowed the student to put more effort into assignments and have fewer outbursts or disruptions in class. Positive regard communicates, “You still belong here,” even when they fall short, and that message often sticks with them long after the class ends. It helps students feel safe enough to try again, knowing that their mistakes don’t define how they’re seen. I hope that even now, my student looks back on their time in my class as a positive experience and connection.
