I think one of the great things about teaching is that we have colleagues who have dealt with the same students, or we can go to when we are not quite sure how to deal with certain situations. It gives us a sounding board, and allows us to see strategies that may work with students. Knowing some student like or dislike this or that is important to making connections and sometimes other adults know those things better than we do. Sometimes, even going to a counselor or social worker to see if there is something going on with the student gives us insight into behaviors and knowing that they may be going through something allows us to "handle with care".
I think when we give students positive regard, and acknowledge them as people of worth, it doesn't take away accountability necessarily, but allows us to help change interactions. For the idea of everyone gets a trophy- We can have different interactions with each student- I may not be able to come to every event, but I can ask how it went. I can show students I care by asking follow up questions that are connected to what their interests are- Did you watch the Bills game? How'd your concert go? Hey I know you had a math test you were studying for- how'd it go. You're tired today, is everything okay? The care is different- but it is there.