Reflect

 its been called Franklin's Conversation about Race. The topics that were talked about closely connect to these 10 week challenge. But when reading the 28 common attitudes article I made some connections based off conversations I overheard from some other teachers, not all but a few. It made me sad to have to made these. I feel that more conversations need to happen to best support our students. She also gave us resources to use with our students as well! 

I really enjoyed this 10 week challenge and I looked forward to it each week. I see my role as an advocate and amplifier of voices. It is MY job to speak up, I cannot rely on my friends and colleagues of color and of marginalized groups to speak up and look out for inequities. I need to make sure that I am speaking up, using my voice and looking for inequities at every turn. 

I have learned that when it comes to race, we have must do better about engaging in conversation about it. We will not begin to see systematic change until we all begin to do better, to engage in courageous conversation, and be open and honest about our feelings and perspectives. We must acknowledge race. As a white woman (woman), we must define white fragility, not take it personal, speak up when we notice actions or comments that need to be addressed, and do more..

The first thing I would NOT do, as a teacher, is tell students that they are members of a different race. All humans share 99.9% of DNA. The .01% of differences result from adaptation or mutations occurring in ancestorial groupings.  The concept of "race" was used to label populations as being "less than", and therefore justifying the oppression of those populations. And, of course, making money.

Having said that, it would be silly to say that people of color or certain ethnic origins or religious or gender affiliations have not been subjected to discrimination or truly awful and cruel policies and campaigns. Slavery and the Holocaust being examples of such horrific tactics. The lack of educational opportunities, however, is less obvious.

 As educators of all, we should be conscious of what we are teaching and how we are teaching.  For example, parents who have had access to higher education are more conscious of expectations by certain grades levels. I, as a parent, knew what math and reading skills my kids should have had by the time they reached a certain grade level. If my child hadn't acquired those skills, I would be on top of it asking why. Another parent, who may not have had the opportunities I had, may have a harder time picking up on that.  As educators, we need to keep an "equal access" frame of mind.

If a practice doesn't fly in an affluent district, it shouldn't be acceptable in a less wealthy district.  Would a wealthy district accept classrooms playing movies during class time?  Would wealthy districts accept class material consistently below reading or math levels or lack of remediation for both skills? Would a wealthier district use programming that was proven to be ineffective? Would a wealthier district allow daily disruptions and physical and emotional threats to students continue?

It's almost impossible to fill in all the gaps once a student reaches high school, however, we can work to improve outcomes. But we have to monitor a child, with RELIABLE instruments from the time a student enters our District. and allocate our resources so that we can maximize results.

Being sure that all our students, regardless of religion, gender affiliation, ancestorial origins or economic status have an equal opportunity to achieve, should be number one on our list.

And, of course, by not alienating students, even inadvertently, helps to keep students' ears and eyes on the long-term goal of equal access and opportunity.

We want our students to believe in themselves and know that they can succeed in life.

During this challenge, I feel like enough ideas were discussed that I could get over some white fragility that cropped up. I mean, before all this I heard of the book “white fragility” and I had no interest in ever picking it up because it seemed like it would be a book all about white weakness, like a giant attack, and who signs up for that? But I understand the term now, and I can put my sensitivity aside and not take conversations about race so personally. I feel like, moving forward, I can understand that my role is to listen and empathize, and change where I can. I understand that I shouldn’t feel disadvantaged by equality, which I think I’ve felt before. 

I started to think critically about my interactions with people of color both in the school building and outside of the school building. I began thinking about my own personal feelings during interactions and how they differ when I am in the controlled setting of being with my students, vs what it is like when I am out in the community. I am more comfortable talking with my colleagues about race and racism but I struggle more having the conversation with my students. There is always a place to talk about race and racism with my students, but I have not found a way personally to implement this in my math classroom. In previous years I have had students respond with “it is because I am black isn’t it”, but I would assure them it was not true and push forward. In my community, I do not talk about race. It is a topic that I am not comfortable discussing. I struggle with what to discuss regarding race. After listening to and reading “10 things every white teacher should know when talking about race” I realize how I am furthering systemic racism by not being part of the conversation. I need to start listening when these conversations arise, and asking for clarification when others are making claims I do not agree with. In the past I have found it easier to remove myself from these conversations, when in reality I should be part of these meaningful conversations.

After thinking about my own feelings regarding sharing these ideas with colleagues and other people I know, I feel like it's a lot easier for me to share and "push back" against those that I don't know well or don't have a real personal connection to, though those close to me know how I feel about racism and that I'm passionate about changing things. I also feel my students have taught me a tremendous amount of information and knowledge surrounding the topic of racism and being an ally. My co-teacher and I have talked a lot with our students regarding whether or not they feel comfortable talking with all teachers about race and why or why not and what we can do to help support students who don't feel comfortable discussing race with other teachers (or us!). I will continue to talk openly with my students about race and racism and continue to educate those around me. I will try to be more conscious of my own privilege and how that impacts my students. 

Many individuals as well as educators avoid talking about race and racism. It’s uncomfortable, may lead to conflict, and calls for skills few of us possess. Often, this avoidance comes down to a fear of misspeaking, sounding racist or unintentionally doing harm. Part of getting students ready to talk about race and racism is to first deal with our own fears. Teaching about structural inequality such as racism requires courage…from us and from our students.

 It’s normal to feel discomfort reflecting on experiences with racial inequality and deepening understanding of racism. However, the more you practice facilitating difficult conversations, the more you’ll be able to manage the discomfort. The conversations may not necessarily get easier, but your ability to press toward more meaningful dialogue will expand. Stay engaged; the journey moving forward is necessary. 

I believe I have two important roles. The first is to have conversations about race with my students and to ensure equity in the classroom. The second role is to engage individuals outside of the classroom in conversations about race and to gently and respectfully call them on their actions and behaviors. I have been increasingly heard well-meaning but still racist statements more recently, most likely because I myself am growing more aware of the more subtle reflections of racism. This is obviously a good thing, but I appreciated the tools and strategies provided in this course to use when having these difficult discussions. 

This has prompted me to educate myself further. I am looking for the next book I will read to continue my education. I am a POC so I find conversations around race exhausting if the person I am talking with is not a trusted close friend. However, I find these conversations with students essential because we have some similar experiences being POC and I feel I create and sustain a safe space where these conversations can happen.